Makeover for a More Dateable

One great thing about single life is that it heightens your sense of awareness. Take your appearance. When suddenly single again, it becomes important to wear your best jeans to the grocery store, or to dab on a touch of lip gloss before Pilates. Because it's often true what they say love hits when you least expect it. And, to your surprise, Mr. Wonderful or Ms. Right could be sauntering down the dairy aisle or wiping down the stair machine. You must be armed at all times.

Even if Mom always hammered in the notion that it's what's on the inside that counts, you don't have to feel guilty about that new car that cries, look at me! or the extra mirror time you manage every morning. Think of your new sense of physical awareness as opportunity to take control of your image and your life. Because when you look good, you feel good. And people take notice of your confidence exuding all over the place.

A friend of mine recently split from her boyfriend of several years and absolutely swears that men are now checking her out left and right (which never happened when she was spoken for). She said she thinks it's in her stride or her aura or something that guys just sense her singleness. Possibly but it may also have something to do with those new leather pants and tight butt she's been working on since the breakup.

• So if during your self-improvement/rejuvenation process, you, like my friend, attract fanciers like white on rice . . . great! Cuz you look gooood, and you're ready to get back out there. Of course, looking good and feeling good can mean many different things, depending on your priorities and what you need to feel comfortable with yourself. Here are a few things you may want to consider:What boosts your ego? Is it having a sculpted physique? A little color on your cheeks? A sassy new pair of sling backs? Maybe its not what's on you, but what you're on, like a big, shiny Harley or new dining room chairs. It may sound superficial, but we all have our comfort zone, and if spending a little cash makes you feel more self-assured and dateable, I say go for it.
• Pluck, peel and primp. And this means both men and women. Spend some time on those eyebrows (if you've got one, make it two), give yourself a good facial (cleanse and exfoliate with a mud mask not out back), and sit down to a manicure and pedicure (think foot rubs and toe massages). If this all sounds like more work than balancing the federal budget, treat yourself to a day at the spa before a big date. (Note: Spa professionals seem to have a knack for spotting unwanted hair that we laymen can't see.)
• Splurge on a good haircut. Can't stress this one enough. I've done the Supercuts thing when I just needed a trim for my low-maintenance do, and it just doesn't compare to the cut you get in a high-end salon. Subtle as the difference may be, a good quality haircut can change your entire look and attitude.
• Eye appeal. Glasses can be very sexy (think Liam Neeson), but if yours make you feel like Revenge of the Nerds, you may want to consider a trendy new pair or look into getting contacts. There are a variety of contact colors available. Try a different shade than your natural eye color for a fun new look.
• The breath test. Do friends constantly offer you Altoids and mint-flavored gum? Do co-workers take a step back when you move in to discuss a delicate business matter? Could it be your breath? It's hard to judge this type of thing for yourself, so if you think you may have a problem, ask a close (and honest) friend's opinion. If he or she confirms the worst, talk to your dental hygienist about possible treatments.
• No clothes, no discipline, no sense of style? Personal assistants are now available for just about any need you can drum up: from personal trainers and personal shoppers, to overall image consultants. Check the yellow pages or the Internet, or talk to a respected salon or gym in your area. But before calling, take some time to make a list of what you really want and need from this miracle worker, so that your stalled-out plan for new and improved doesn't just become your assistant's. Work with your personality and complement your best traits.
• Inside out. Personal makeovers extend beyond the physical. I asked a very attractive and dateable male friend to tell me what draws him to certain women, and his response would make anyone feel better about the dating scene: I think men love a confidant woman, someone who's not too flashy, but carries herself well. Personality is a plus too; a good personality can make an average woman more beautiful, or a beautiful woman even better looking.